so, tell me your story.

Dear Atuk,

This week, my lecturer gave me an assignment which I feel is special. Why? It gives me an opportunity to “talk” to you even though you are not anywhere here. But I know you are somewhere near me. Many years have passed since you left the rest of the family and I. I can still remember vividly when you let out your last breath at the old Alexandra Hospital. I was right next to you, on your bed. That time, I saw mama cried silently, Aunty Rohani and the other uncles cried as well. But at the mere age of four or five years old, I did not know what was happening. All I knew was that, as I grew up, I knew about you through pictures and stories told by mama. Sometimes, she tells me how you actually look like one of the actors when the black and white malay shows are telecast on the television. I found old photographs of us; I was sitting on your lap and you smile was sweet. Many years have passed, and the rest of your grandchildren and I grew up and in fact one of us is getting married next year, atuk.

Sometimes, I wish you were still here with us. I am sure you will be surprised to see how big and tall we have grown. Some of us are already working while the others like me, are schooling. In case you forgot how old I am right now, well, I am 17 years old already. I am currently schooling in Ngee Ann Polytechnic and I hope to graduate with a diploma is Film, Sound and Video. If you were to ask me what my ambition is, well, honestly speaking I am not sure myself. I either have too many things or nothing that I want to do. But I hope to be working in a media production. You know something, my dream job is actually becoming a teacher. But anyway, I am joyful to be in this school.

Atuk, did you know that I am not the fair granchild that you had. I am so much darker now after all the school activities and hockey that I took part throughout my primary and secondary school years. I know that when I was young, I looked rather small in size. Well, as I entered primary one my body weight started to increase. And by the age of twelve and thirteen, I looked like a balloon! The increase was tremendous that I was in a Trim and Fit club ever since primary five to secondary two. But at the end of secondary two, my friend urged me to join the school’s hockey team which helped me to lose the excess weight.

I wish I could tell you more of how I am now compared to last time when you were still with us. But, I do not really remember how I behave when I was with you. How I communicated with you and how you played or laughed at my silly moves when I was a young toddler. But I know that you showered me with sufficient love although it was only for the first four years of my life and I would like to thank you from the bottom of my heart for that. I love you.

With much love,

Natra Nuryanie Bte Aziz

*atuk – grandfather.